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The Balloon Is About To Burst

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The Balloon Is About To Burst

While The Political Elite Go Bonkers Over A Balloon, Citizens Are Losing Their Power

Jesse & Tyrel Ventura
Feb 7
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The Balloon Is About To Burst

jesseventura.substack.com
Credit: Getty Images/VCG Contributor

Nothing better for ratings and political points than a good old fashioned crisis of our own invention, and that was clearly the case this last weekend when pundits, politicians, and war hawks across the United States lost their collective heads over… a balloon. Yes, a balloon.

But this wasn’t just any random balloon, gently drifting above our purple mountains majesty… This was a CHINESE BALLOON! Cue the dramatic music.

Yes, there was lots of fist waging and teeth gnashing as reports of a strange Chinese balloon began to spread across the U.S. airwaves. While the official line from the Chinese Government was that the large dopey object was nothing more than a weather balloon that had strayed off course, that didn’t stop us from immediately fear mongering the hell out of the balloon and turning it into an international incident. Republicans in particular saw the errant balloon as an opportunity to attack President Joe Biden over his apparent weak stance on balloons.

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